Moving Forward
by Miss Riss
Summary: Damon is moving on and Elena is jealous... Post season three finale. Delena , klaroline. *changing this story to an M rating...it will be getting intense! R&R DELENA
1. Chapter 1

Moving Forward

AN: Takes place post season three finale and three months or so into the future. Damon is ready to move on with someone new, but is Elena ready to let him go forever? DELENA … Klaroline & other ships.

/

Elena POV

I _use_ to love the rain.

The variation of it to be exact; the way it trickles down glass windows when it's a light shower, and the way it pours down in a bad storm.

Now the thought of water, in any variation, makes me angry.

My parents lost their lives in water, but that night I was saved from the same fate… only to lose my life years later in the same predicament. It was as if the circle came back around. The grim reaper came knocking at my door once again, telling me I was meant to die that night with my parents. My life could be depicted in a final destination movie.

Except movies don't account for vampirism… and fortunately or maybe unfortunately for me, real life does.

I open my front door, cringing at the view of the rain storm outside. Being a vampire heightens my senses, which makes the rain beating against the cement sound almost thunderous.

Like I said…I _use_ to love the rain.

Now-a-days I'm saying _I use to love _to a lot of things…

/

7:30.

I look at my watch every few minutes, shifting anxiously in a bar stool. Where the hell could Caroline be? The question keeps running through my mind as I start to really worry, because the neurotic, control-freak Caroline that I know, is never late…let alone 20 minutes late, AND not answering her damn phone.

7:40

I am so nervous at this point that I'm about to start rallying up the vampire troops to look for her, when suddenly she stalks into the Grill. Even Gina, the sassy new bartender, feels the wrath that is Caroline walking toward us.

She pours a shot of tequila before Caroline sits down, and smirks at my seething blonde friend. "Another bad day hun?" her cute voice annoys me to no end, but I grind my teeth and let the feeling ride.

"Ugh, how can you tell?" Caroline asks dramatically, and offers a weak smile to Gina.

"You girls let me know if you want to start a tab tonight," Gina offers, flipping her silky black hair over her shoulders and going to help other customers.

I watch her closely; she's twenty-two, has big green eyes, full lips, luminescent skin and a perfect body to match. What man wouldn't be head over heels for her if she gave them a shot?

I swallow the growing mass forming in my throat, and hear a chuckle to my left. "Elena, you are staring again," Caroline teases…surely my insanity is lightning her mood.

"I am not staring," I sulk, folding my arms over my chest, "nor have I ever."

"Hmm sure," she rolls her eyes, letting the last chuckle escape her. She then proceeds to pound her head into the bar counter.

I pinch her arm, and furrow my eyebrows as she yelps in pain.

"Do you forget that you are super strong now?" she hisses, rubbing her arm like a four-year old.

"What's wrong with you Care?" I want to skip the non-sense tonight. "Why were you late?"

She sighs, "its Klaus again, every time I turn around its like he's there!"

"Is he bothering you now? Has he been trying to hurt you?" I bite my bottom lip, trying to put on my most serious face.

"He would never hurt me Elena," she throws her hands up in the air like it is the worst thing in the world, "that's the point!"

'I'm confused, can you let me know why he's bothering you so much if he's not actually bothering you?" I am trying my hardest to suppress my laughter now.

"I know you are about to laugh, and as a friend I just want to let you know that you are one cruel, sick little blood-sucker!" she rants, frowning.

"Sorry," I offer, "no more teasing, I promise."

She downs the rest of her tequila, (ew!), and frowns. "I think he's starting to get under my skin Elena. What am I going to do?"

Although I haven't exactly grown to even be able to tolerate Klaus, it is obvious to me and everyone else in our twisted circle that Klaus is in love with Caroline. Maybe being in love is a little too strong of feeling for someone who doesn't have a heart? I shrug to myself, whatever he feels for her is strong enough for him to linger around in mystic falls for months when he has nothing left to stay here for. When I became a vampire, we all figured Klaus would skip town or kill us all since his human blood bank was not so human anymore. It's been three months and neither option has happened, so maybe he actually is capable of love after all. The real question is not whether Klaus wants Caroline, but if Caroline reciprocates the feeling. We all already know the answer to that. It's obvious…to everyone, BUT Caroline!

"Go out with him," I offer simply, shrugging my shoulders and taking a swig of my Bourbon. The smell brings back memories of not too long ago…

"That's your brilliant solution to my huge problem?" She shrieks, shaking her head in disbelief. "Tell me that is not your solution to solve the havoc that is now my life?"

My sigh is louder and more dramatic than I intend, "Listen Care- the only way you are going to know what to do about Klaus is if you actually give him a slim chance." She stares at me in horror, but doesn't speak so I continue, "he's not going to stop trying to pursue you unless you give him a damn chance! If you really don't feel anything for him after that then I'm sure he will stop all of this."

She considers what I say for a few minutes, and a smile lights up her face. "You are soooooo right Elena Gilbert," she nods, still smiling. "I think this is the best advice you've ever given me, in fact."

"What can I say," I shrug and smile back, "I am wonderful at giving advice."

"If only you were wonderful at taking it," she snorts.

"Listen," I throw my hands in the air, "I do the best I can! Damon is obviously moving on and I am single for the first time in years. It's wonderful by the way," I point to her, "I can actually focus on me, and not all the confusion that is Stefan and Damon and love and eternity and all the other rubbish."

"I'm just saying," she counters, "you broke up with Stefan not even two weeks after becoming a vampire and we all know it's because YOU know you made the wrong choice."

"Since when have you become pro Damon?" I glare at her.

"I am not pro Damon, but its only obvious that you love him," she rolls her eyes. "Although for some reason you cannot get it through your thick skull, or your dead cold heart."

I suck my teeth, "I do not love Damon. I love our friendship…that is all!"

She chuckles, "whatever you say Elena, but don't even consider it when he really has moved on and it's too late."

I bite my bottom lip and glance in Gina's direction.

"Maybe we should open up a tab tonight," I sigh.

My blonde friend silently agrees.

/

Review please… it helps to know whether I should move forward with this story!

=] thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Moving Forward

AN: You will get to see a very jealous Elena in this story, and I promise most of it will be fun. =] I will switch in and out between Elena, Damon, Klaus and Carolines POV's throughout the story! Please review; words of encouragement keep me going.

_Damon/_

I can't smell her anymore…

It would always drive me crazy. It seemed I could be miles away and still catch a faint scent that only belonged to her. It was intoxicating to say the least, and unexplainable. Her scent, the one that was uniquely her, wasn't due to perfume or clean clothes… it was just _her… _

And now it's gone.

Vampirism robbed her of something that kept me reeling, like a feign to a drug if I went a day without breathing in that smell that was only hers…I would start to lose it. I'm not saying that I don't find everything else about her completely compelling, because I do, oh I do, but vampirism robbing her of something so innate made my life just a little bit easier. It made the days and nights feel just a little shorter, and made my heart ache just a little less because I no longer have to feign for just a whiff of human Elena.

And everyday moving on feels just a little bit closer.

/

I take a swig of my burbon as I glance at her from across the bar. She's chatting it up with vampire Barbie, who flashes me a rather fake smile. Elena finally allows her soulful brown eyes to lock with mine, and I then have to resist falling into the 'trance' de Elena'. I break the intimate eye contact with a smirk, and another swig.

"I'm happy you're here," comes an interruption that I am more than grateful for. "I thought maybe you were standing me up tonight." Gina pouts playfully, and pours me another shot of burbon before scurrying off to break up a small bar 'spat'. I watch her in amazement as she handles the men with ease, and it is down right …sexy.

I am busy fantasizing about heading back to Gina's place, ripping her clothes to shreds and taking her on the kitchen table when I am interrupted.

"Damon, I've been calling you for a few days." Elena's voice sounds weary, and soft. She crosses one arm to her chest and pulls her other arm in a hug. "Is it safe to say that you're completely avoiding me now?"

I chuckle, distracting Elena so I can collect my thoughts. I wouldn't say I have been avoiding Elena these past few **weeks**, but having direct conversation with her hasn't been on the top of my to do list. It's not like I take time out of my day to scope out Elena's daily plans and make sure mine run in the opposite direction. _Okay_ … so maybe I do avoid her just a little. "I am not avoiding you Elena," I shrug, letting a guilty smirk play on my lips. "I am just simply a very busy man…and besides ever since you've become a vampire there hasn't been any sign of danger around you." It wouldn't be me if I didn't add, "if we don't count those truckers you bled dry two months ago", for good measure. "So honestly, unless you have somehow managed to catch the attention of a crazy vampire hunter who wants to eat us all for breakfast then we don't **need **to talk at all." I can't catch the words fast enough before they fall from my lips. Fuck…

Miss Elena ice-grills me, grinding her teeth that I'm sure are turning fangy' as we speak. "We use to be friends." Her words are much softer than her face, and I realize how big of a dick I truly am.

"We still are friends Elena," I sigh and slump down in my chair. "I didn't mean that…I've just been distracted lately."

Her eyes move swiftly toward Gina, and her face contorts with a frown. "Sleeping with the bartender is not a good enough excuse Damon."

I fall silent, which rarely happens by the way. It's obvious that 'little I'm on a mission' knows without a doubt that I am in fact avoiding her, but what gets me is the emotion I hear in her voice. At the moment my radar is out of whack and I can't exactly pin point what is _really _eating at her. When all other logic and theories seem to fail my go to scenario always leads back to, "is this about Stefan?"

She sighs at my question, running her fingers through her long brown hair. After a couple of seconds she replies, "No, this is not about Stefan. I spoke with him yesterday and all is well, but I'm sure you know that because you speak to him everyday." That's not exactly what I was getting at and Elena realizes that and continues, "Stefan and I are over, but we have remained friends. I feel happy for him, Damon…But that's it, we are over and we have both moved on."

Memories return of the day my little brother left town last month for a long trip. _This is not forever. _His words replay in my head everyday as I silently and secretly miss him. He claimed to feel the need to travel the world for a few months, but I know better…I know that my brother needed to get away from the drama that is Elena Gilbert. Elena chose Stefan. It would _always _be Stefan, and yet a couple of weeks later broke his heart into a million pieces. I guess I won in the situation because Elena let me go first with the knowledge that I wasn't her choice…but my poor brother believed she was his forever and SURPRISE- little miss confused dropped a bomb on him. She loved him, but she was no longer in love with him and didn't think she could ever be again. It was over…

After that my self-preservation instincts kicked in full force, and I chose to start dodging Elena. It hasn't been the easiest task considering her new vamp speed and heightened senses, but it needs to be done. I refuse to be available for Elena playing tango with my heart once again…and worse- doing to me what she has done to Stefan. And I am not a fallback because things didn't work out with my brother. She is not in love with either of us…She's just wants the both of us. I'd say she's about as selfish as Katherine, but way less easy to hate.

And besides I genuinely like Gina. She's not your average human, witch blood flows through her, but she chose not to practice magic long ago. She was just another distraction for my aching heart, but now something about her intrigues me and keeps me coming back for more.

Moving on completely might not be so hard after all.

Elena stares at me like I grew another head…most likely wondering what's taking so long for me to respond to her statement. "Earth to Damon."

"Oh, right…you and Stefan are both happy **not **together and all that good stuff." My reply is sarcastic and I arch my eyebrow. "So what is it Elena? What's wrong?"

"I-," she bites her bottom lip, looking more like the awkward human that I knew and loved and less like the bad ass vamp she is now, "I miss you Damon."

And who would have knew four little words could make such an impact.

Double fuck.

/

The quicker you review the quicker I'll update! Hehe =] …really let me know what you think, I know its moving slow but it will pick up next chapter.

Review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Moving** **Forward**

**AN**: this chapter will start off Elena's POV and then switch into normal narrative chapter. I'm switching this story to an M rating as it will get more intense as the story goes on and it will start with this chapter! …oh, and for the sake of my story vampires have normal bodily functions (I was still unsure of this after researching). Please review! It really helps get me going!

/-

_Elena_

"I miss you Damon," the words fall from my lips before I could catch them.

His eyes lock with mine, and I swear if only for a second I see the love and longing I use to see pass through them. He furrows his eyes brows, and in five seconds his defensive walls are back up. He mumbles some lame excuse to end our conversation, and whispers something to Gina, that even my vampire hearing cant quite make out, before disappearing. _Great_… as if my night couldn't get any worse Gina asks her boss if she can leave a little early this evening. My stomach turns, and a heated emotion runs through me. My mind wanders, thoughts of Damon touching her, kissing her and doing unthinkable things with her plagues me.

But the worst thought of all is that he is happy with her.

And after all of this time, all that I've put him through, who am I to tell him that she is not the right woman for him? Who am I to tell him that every time I see him with Gina it pains me to my core? How can I tell him that the thought of him making love to her shatters my heart into a million little pieces?

How do I tell a man that I denied for so long that I was just scared? Scared of having that forever love, and of forever being someone's only choice. How do I tell him that I was terrified of his all-consuming love for me? But more importantly how do I tell him that I feel the same?

Because I do... I am completely and utterly consumed in my love for him. I would have to have been a complete idiot not to realize it a long time ago, and I wasn't- I just tried to fight it.

But I don't know how to fight it off any longer. I can't hide this anymore. I need to let him know how I feel before I lose him forever…

If I haven't already…

/-**+

To her dismay Caroline returned home to find it empty. She really didn't want to be alone tonight…and since Bonnie was busy with Jeremy and Elena had some secret mission she just _had_ to go on, Caroline was really counting on her mom to be home.

She turned on her bedroom light and her eyes went wide. She inhaled the sweet scent of chocolate, and let out a small gasp. Her room was filled with flowers, and not just any flowers… beautiful, rare flowers that she had only seen in books. Caroline picked up a card that lay on her dresser.

_One of the most rare flowers in the world,_

_The Chocolate Cosmos,_

_Has only a shadow of your beauty_

_And nearly smells as sweet_

_Klaus _

/

Klaus sat in his dimly lit room beside an open window, painting another piece. He decided it was time to paint something other than Miss Caroline Forbes, and the sky looked just right tonight in mystic falls.

"Doesn't anyone ever knock around here?" he called as he heard his front door open. He continued to paint, scowling because of the interruption that was most likely his annoying little sister. His body froze as he caught a faint whiff of _her_ scent behind him.

"Caroline love." He wasn't expecting her to come, and if he was being honest he wasn't even expecting her to speak to him at all in the near future. He turned to face her, "what a pleasant surprise."

She crossed her arms, scowling. "You can't keep doing this Klaus."

Now he was intrigued… he stood, moving closer to her. "Do what love?"

Playing dumb was something he did often and it made Caroline snort. "You know what Klaus, stop buying me gifts!"

"I didn't buy those flowers," he retorted teasingly.

If it were still possible for her to flush now would be the time. She was certainly flustered and annoyed, "Well whatever! You gave me very rare flowers! The seventh most rare flower in the world to be exact! How the hell did you get them? And your note," she threw her arms up and continued her rant, "was ridiculously flattering! And I'm tired of it Klaus! I'm soooooo tired of having to shoot you down. Aren't you tired of it too? I mean how long can you really keep this up for?"

By the time Caroline was done speaking Klaus stood right in front of her. "You're very cute when you ramble on like that."

Caroline inhaled sharply, far too aware of Klaus's close proximity and of the tingling of her skin. "I'm tired of it Klaus," her tone sounded defeated as she looked up into his enthralling eyes, "aren't you?"

His heart began to beat faster in his chest, something that only seemed to happen when Caroline was close by. He searched her eyes for a sign, anything that confirmed his theory of the underlying meaning to her words. After a few short seconds he inhaled, and whispered, "that I am- love," before pulling her roughly into a kiss.

As their lips met Caroline felt more alive than she felt her whole life…vampire and human. She deepened the kiss by bringing her hand to the small of his back and pulling him forward. He sighed into the kiss, and dragged his tongue against her bottom lip. Opening her mouth slowly she granted him access, and as his tongue found hers every nerve in her body sparked at the same time.

Klaus rubbed his hips onto hers and when she moaned in response he pushed further. Her eyes widened slightly in response to the feeling of his erection against her jeans. She began to suck on his bottom lip, nibbling softly and then a little harder until she heard a moan escape him. This only intensified her need for him, and she pulled away from him slightly and began to frantically undo the buttons on his shirt.

He moved his hand to hers and shook his head with a sigh. "As much as I want you right now love, I need to act like a gentleman."

She furrowed her eyebrows, retracting her hand from his. "Are you freaking kidding me?" she hissed, "you kill people for fun, try to eat my friends and family for no good reason, but when it comes to this you want to be a gentleman?"

He smiled in amusement, and began to button the buttons that she had undone. "Ah love, but that's all in the past. And I've always been a gentleman with you, have I not?"

Caroline thought of all the months and all of the gifts and every single time that he had a chance to kiss her but hadn't. "Well yes, but…"

"I fancy you love," he cut her off, wrapping his arms around her.

She wanted to fight him off, but every muscle in her body went limp at his touch.

"I want to do this right," he brushed a stray hair behind her ear. "I just hope that when you walk out of my door you remember the way you feel right now and you give me a chance to actually court you."

Caroline couldn't speak, his lips were too close and his skin almost felt warm on hers. He leaned forward placing a chaste kiss on her lips, carefully pulling away before their passion ignited.

She opened her eyes with a frown, only to find he was sitting at his easel. A small smile crept up her face. "Well in that case I'm expecting a very wonderful date."

"I wouldn't have it any other way love," he replied, brushing the paint with beautiful grace.

"You are a very talented man," were her last words before she disappeared.

/-**+

Damon rolled over in bed, trying not to wake Gina, who slept peacefully in his arms. His phone rang twice in the past hour and he completely ignored it, and now he received a text. Whoever it was had better have a damn good reason for being so persistent.

His breath hitched in his throat as he realized it was Elena trying to reach him. Fear went through him as he thought of all the possible reasons she would be calling him at this late hour. Her text read:

Damon. Please, it's important!

He slipped out of bed, careful not to wake Gina and dialed Elena's number. "Is everything okay?" he tried not to sound frantic, but began to get dressed in vamp speed.

Her voice was soft, "Yes, I mean…no…I need to speak with you and I'm sorry that its so late but its very important."

"Are you home?"

"Yes."

"I'll be right there," he ended the call, and placed a kiss on Gina's head before disappearing into the night.

Elena sat crossed legged on her bed when Damon climbed through her window. He noticed how nervous she looked, and he sighed. Many possible scenarios including those of vampire hunters, witch problems or even Stefan problems flooded his mind.

"Hey," he said gently, sitting beside Elena on her all too familiar bed. It had been months since he seen the inside of Elena's room, and strangely he found comfort in the fact that everything was exactly as he remembered.

"Hi," she smiled, but didn't look at him directly. She knew that it was time to be honest, and prolonging would only make this harder, but it had never been easy to tell her feelings to anyone.

"What's wrong?" he asked, touching her cheek softly and willing her eyes to meet his.

She inhaled sharply and closed her eyes at the feel of his fingers against her skin. Elena couldn't remember the last time that he had touched her, and the feeling of it at this was indescribable.

"Elena, the suspense is killing me- is it Stefan? Is he okay?"

She shook her head, biting her bottom lip and frowning at the idea that Damon thought this was about Stefan. "No, this has nothing to do with Stefan." Elena forced herself to look into his piercing blue eyes again, and swallowed a growing mass that formed in her throat. "This is about us."

"Us?" he replied in confusion, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Well me," she shifted uncomfortably, running her fingers through her long brown hair. It was now or never…"I- …I love you Damon."

Damon's slow beating heart must have stopped for a couple of seconds hearing those three little words. "You what?" he nearly screamed, sounding as incredulous as ever and turning away. "You've got to be kidding me!"

"No, Damon." She placed her hand on his chest, forcing him to stare into her doe eyes. "I'm not kidding. I am in love with you and I have been for a long time."

He felt every human emotion run through him at once as she told him she was _in love _with him. _Anger, fear, and love were just to name a few. _It wouldn't be Damon if he didn't act out on the head. "Let me get this straight; you strung me along for months and months and then when you FINALLY had the balls to choose, which only happened because you thought we might die," he paused for dramatic affect, "you chose my brother over me…things didn't work out with him, and now you've had a revelation that I am your one true love?"

Elena flinched at his cold words, tears brimming in her eyes. "I'm sorry Damon, but-"

"No," he cut her off and stood to leave, "I don't want to hear anymore of your little confessions tonight. I can barely wrap my head around even trying to believe the first one."

With vamp- speed Elena stood her ground in front of him, crossing her arms to her chest. "You can yell at me all I want, degrade me if you feel its necessary, but you are not running away from this."

He grimaced, moving closer into her proximity. "Move out of my way Elena or I will use force to move you myself."

"Damon, is that what we have came down to? Will you really hit me now just because I'm a vampire?"

"If its necessary," he snarled.

Elena let a few tears fall from her eyes, but didn't budge.

His face softened at the sight of her pain, and he sighed. "Please Elena, I just need to go sleep this off. You should too, I think you're too tired or maybe hungry and deprived from all senses to think straight."

"See that's the problem Damon… I can barely sleep and I barely have an appetite because all I do is think about you." She let the tears steadily flow now, and looked away embarrassed by her confession. "And I'm hungry Damon, and I'm tired so please…at the very least listen to what I have to say."

/

**Please** review

/


	4. Chapter 4

Moving Forward

AN: First- HAPPY TURKEY DAY to those who celebrate =] . I am so sorry that it has taken me so long to post a new chapter! I have been diagnosed with vertigo, and have been out of commission for a while. This chapter is short and serious, definitely going to be lighter chapters coming, but I had to just bang this one out. I am really, really loving the wonderful story line of the show right now. Cant wait for Damon and Elena to have their chance, and I could only hope this is not a phase! Sorry for the Stelena shippers, but I LOVED their break up lol. I'm horrible…I know! Please review =] I love hearing from all of you!

x

I watch as Elena crosses her arms to her chest, a fierce look in her eyes. My annoyance rises just below its peak, but I know that she will make this conversation happen one way or the other. With a heavy sigh and the best grimace I can form I give in to her request.

I really need a drink. At times like this I would give my own arm if it meant Ric were still alive.

Elena acknowledges my consent as I plummet down on her bed. I swear that she is fighting off a smile and it only annoys me that much more. "Well then have at it." I don't even attempt to hide the frustration in my voice.

She sighs, but pulls up a chair to sit directly in front of me. I guess this is her way of making sure I listen. The baby vamp feels she can test me. "Damon, before I became a vampire I felt that Stefan was my best choice."

I suppress the urge to flinch at her statement. Instead I offer her my best eye roll and gesture for her to continue with my hands. She looks as if she's about to smack me upside the head for a second but then relaxes,

"I love Stefan, and I always will," her lips purse together, and she closes her eyes, "but I am not _in love _with Stefan. I love that he respects me, and respects my choices no matter how foolish they are…something you've never done." She shoots me a pointed look, and I roll my eyes. "I love that he has helped me emotionally through all of my losses and I know that he always will be there for me. I can name a million reasons why I love Stefan, but I cannot think of one reason why I believe I am _in_ _love_ with him. Damon, before my parents passed I was a different person," her statement causes her to shift, a gloomy expression on her face. "I used to want all that life could offer, I use to crave adventure and excitement. After they passed away it was like something shifted inside of me. I longed for safety and consistency…something that Stefan offered, and I loved him for it instantly…but that just is not enough for me anymore!" The conviction in her tone switches on a light inside of me, awakening me.

"I feel like my true self now. The girl who I left somewhere out on Wickery Bridge that night of my parents accident…she is back now that I am a vampire." Elena stares deeply into my eyes, pleading with me. "I can think of a so many reasons why I should hate you for all that you've ever done, but it doesn't change the fact that when you're within a mile of me my heart starts beating fast again…I feel human when you're within a proximity of me, Damon. I see adventure in your eyes that I crave. I am completely, hopelessly consumed by my love for you," Her words start sounding familiar and she nods slowly as my lips part in remembrance of the memory. "All of the things that I want out of life lead me back to you. I wish that you wouldn't have made me forget, because maybe things would be different now, but I cant blame you for the way we've ended up. I've fought my feelings for you for so long because I was scared of this kind of love. With all the chaos in my life I thought I couldn't handle it. But I just can't fight it any longer, and I don't want to, because I don't want to lose you…I'm, I'm so sorry Damon. I can name a million reasons why I _should _be _in love _with Stefan, but the one reason that holds me back from that is you. It's because I know deep in my heart… _I know _that I am _in love _with **you**."

My chest feels tight. I must look like a deer in headlights because Elena pouts and grabs my hand. I want to buckle at her touch, pull her into my arms so that I can have more… tell her that I've been waiting for so long to hear those words. I want to hold her and never let go again, whisper many promises to her, but instead I snatch my hand away. A sadness flashes through her eyes, and I can hear her swallow.

"You don't believe me?" tears form in her big doe eyes, but she doesn't break our contact. Who looks like Bambi now?

My ever so persistent mind is screaming for me to run. I don't have to scan Elena's room or think for long before I'm planning the most plausible exit that ensures my safety against her quick flying fists. But my heart wins the battle as it begs me to just hear her out…to just believe.

My gut clenches, and I revert to staring back at Elena, who now sports a waterfall full of tears. My former defense of comparing her to the only other woman I've ever loved was false and unfair. This is not about playing games; she is not Katherine… And If I am being honest with myself, I have always known in my heart that she reciprocated my feelings, but I never thought it would come to this. I never thought that she would choose me, and I was content with it. Truth be told- I don't know how to be someone's choice, someone's one and only true love…after being second choice to Stefan all of my life it just doesn't feel right; even our own father would've gladly cast me aside if he was ever offered a choice between sons. And because I never knew what it was like, I told myself that I never wanted the responsibility... to be completely loved. I fought for Katherine's affection for so long, and deep down in my darkest depths I found comfort in the fact that I loved someone who would never chose me. I accepted that I could love whole- heartedly, but never _honestly _expected the production of an exclusive long lasting relationship with anyone.

I am terrified to even consider that an everlasting love is in the cards for me. I don't think I know _how _to love the **right** way. And Elena deserves it. She deserves someone like my brother, who could, without fail give her all that she needs. I am not good enough for her. I will never be, I have to let her go.

And I'm suddenly angry with myself … I should have never came between her and Stefan.

"Damon," she cries my name for an answer and the pain in her voice makes me shudder.

I want to revert to my old tactics, make her hate me by throwing some cruel words at her, but the look in her eyes weakens me. Still, I can't think of a way of saying what I need to say and doing it pleasantly. I look away to compose myself.

"Elena, we could never work." My deadpan surprises even me. I catch my breath after hearing her gasp. "I'm sorry, I just can't be with you. The truth is I've moved on and I am happy."

She shakes her head, tears rushing down her cheeks. "You're lying! I don't believe you."

"It's the truth."

"But…But you said you would never leave me." Her own words must have caught her off guard, she looks away ashamed.

My temper kicks in a little, so much for an attempt at being Mr. Nice Guy. "Yes, and then you rejected me countless times. I am not a toy you can just cast aside until your more superior toy breaks Elena."

"I-" she stammers.

"Save it," I hiss and stand to leave. "Listen, I'm sorry if I hurt you, but I don't feel that way about you anymore. It's too late, you have already lost me." It took everything I have tell these lies to the woman I love, who sits before me a wreck. "I hope that we can still be friends."

I vanish from her room…shedding a few tears as I hear her break down into violent sobs.

I struggle not to go back to her, reminding myself that this is for the best.

For the both of our sakes…

XxX

====== Review please :]


	5. Chapter 5

AN: I just want to apologize for my rather long hiatus. I've been getting over some really bad vertigo, and then got hit with horrible writers block. I also want to apologize in advance if you could notice some of this within this chapter. I just want to release it so I could move forward with the next chapter I've started on. Hope you like it.

/ Elena pov

It took what felt like an eternity to admit my true feelings to the man that I love, and it took him all of five minutes to burn my bridge of hope to ashes. I sat for hours, a crumpled spirit howling at the heavens like a wolf on a full moon. Courage to want what I want, accept and ultimately obtain my desires is a trait I seldom possess. For just a few minutes I owned courage, but as quickly as it came is as quickly as it left because _he _began to dash my dreams of our future.

As all hope circled the drain a thought needled its way into my mind. Damon fought for me for so long. He stood on the sidelines watching while I fawned over Stefan. He waited while I confessed to confusion over which Salvatore brother owned my heart. He loved me from a distance, but stood by me as a friend. And in the end, after he was there for me through thick and thin… pausing his life to protect, comfort and continuously mend my broken heart- I chose his brother. I chose what I considered my best option at the time. I didn't follow my heart, and even still- he offered me a friendship.

My heart wins the battle against my pessimistic mind and my wounded pride. I will fight for Damon's love- like he fought for mine.

/

"Caroline, take a deep breath and slow down." I watch my friend with concern as she huffs and bangs her head against my kitchen table. She seems to be doing a lot of this lately…

When she finally starts to form coherent sentences I'm taking aback by what she blurts out.

"I may have, sort of kissed Klaus back this time," she sounds like a grade school kid and when I gasp she continues quickly. "I also may have agreed to go on a date with him, which is supposed to be happening tonight."

"What?" I furrow my eyebrows, step back slightly and stare at my fidgety friend who adorns a guilty half smile.

"Oopps?" she offers, which isn't her greatest line of defense.

Silence engulfs the small space between us. Caroline slowly allows her head to fall in shame but almost suffers whiplash when I burst into laughter.

"Elena, what are you laughing at?" she gapes at me, incredulously.

"I definitely lost that bet," my laughter slowly ceases when my friends' eyes grow wide. "Bonnie knew you couldn't last another week, I gave you until after the holidays to admit it."

"Excuse me?" Caroline huffs, crossing her arms to her chest,

"You've been into big bad Klaus for… I don't know…ever." I casually shrug and offer her a half smile. When she doesn't speak I lay my hand on hers, "It's okay Care."

After what seems like a millennium Caroline sighs, and offers me some eye contact. "I've been fighting this for so long, I just feel like a hypocrite."

"Why?" I ask, suppressing a smirk. I love asking questions that I already know the answer to.

"I tried keeping you away from Damon for so long because of all the horrible stuff he has done," she grumbles, "and here I am kissing a monster."

I agree, but decide to cut my sorry friend a break. "A beautiful monster," I offer and we both break out into laughter.

"That he is," she admits, feeling a little more at ease. "He seems to have changed. He's more levelheaded, less angry and hasn't caused us any 'real' drama in months. I just hope I'm not making the wrong decision giving him a chance."

I purse my lips. "You really do like him."

My statement seems to catch her off guard because she looks up quickly into my eyes. She frowns and bites her bottom lip. "Yes…Yes I do."

"So don't hesitate Care," sadness laces my words. "You never know when he will move on and you **will** regret not letting your feelings lead the way."

She narrows her eyebrows at me, a frown plastered on her lips at realization that I could relate to my own words. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'll be fine. I'm not giving up on him Caroline. I'm not letting him go this time…not so easily at least." I try to sound as determined and lively as possible even though part of me is still skeptical. "This is not about me though, this is about you and your ever so pestering mind! Now pick up your phone and call him back."

She sighs, resigned, and dials a number that she (hilariously) knows by heart. "Yes Klaus, I'll go out with you tonight. Two conditions… Number one- no creepy little hybrid body guards following us around. What? NO! I said NO hybrids! Okay, deal! And secondly- you cannot give me any gifts whatsoever. Of course a blood bag doesn't count." She rolls her eyes and I laugh hysterically. "Yes, that was Elena. No I wont ask her that. I said no! You're so annoying! I'm hanging up now before I change my mind about tonight. Goodbye."

Before I could ask what the question that Klaus wanted to ask me was, Caroline holds her hand in the air in a stopping gesture. "Please, no more Klaus conversation for the day," she sighs dramatically, but a smile spreads across her face.

I roll my eyes, fighting off the infectiousness of her smile. "At least one of us has a date." The words leave my mouth unexpectedly, and I quickly decide that I no longer have a filter.

She looks taken aback by this, but she recovers quickly as she places her phone in my hand. "Call him."

"And say what?" I ask, confused.

"Tell him you want to apologize in person for last night, and that it's really important that you talk to him in person."

"I don't know if that will work, I doubt he wants to talk about it."

She frowns, nodding slowly, but her face lights up as an idea hits her. "Tell him we have vampire problems and he needs to get to the boarding house ASAP…that it's an emergency!"

"That would work," I bite my bottom lip and stare at my friends over the top couture phone case, briefly wondering how I became best friends with my opposite. Now that I think about it the only things we've ever had in common were cheerleading and Damon. The ladder makes my stomach queasy so I shake off the thought and look into my friends' eager eyes. "And then what? I don't even know what to say…don't you think it's a little too soon to try to talk to him about my feelings again?"

"Yes," she smiles, "it is definitely too soon for that. BUT you need to apologize to him, tell him you want him to be happy and if he is happy being with Gina that you will accept that. Tell him you don't want to lose his friendship and that you need him right now more than ever. Make up some sob story about you needing a friend. Get under his skin again Elena, and show him that you are there to stay. Remind him of the connection you share and of the friendship that makes the two of you special to each other. And maybe do a little inconspicuous flirting here and there," she bats her eyelashes and grins playfully.

"I can't believe you are giving me this advice about the man who, only a few months ago, you would have gladly staked if given the opportunity," I point out.

She rolls her eyes, "well things change, and so do people."

"Well aren't you little miss understanding lately, I wonder what or who," I emphasize the ladder and she winces, "has been changing you." I snicker and glance down at her phone, debating internally.

"Oh, just do it already," she half growls.

I look up, raising my eyebrow. I'm pretty sure the snarling and death glares she currently sends my way aren't all because of my indecision. I decide to drop all Klaus remarks, even the subtle ones, for the rest of the night like she asked in order to keep peace with my vampire elder. Prissy and all, she would definitely kick my ass if it came down to it.

I nervously dial the number that will be forever steeped in my brain and take a deep breath.

Damon answers on the second ring, 'Blondie?'

I swallow, 'Um no…it's me'

'Elena?' he sounds annoyed and I cringe. 'Is your phone dead or something? Why are you calling me from Carolines' phone?' It sounds weird hearing him actually say Caroline's name.

'I didn't think you would pick up,' is my honest answer, and it sounds even more pathetic coming out of my mouth than it did when it was in my head.

He doesn't speak for a few very long seconds and I wonder if he hung up on me before I hear a sigh. 'Elena, I really…' he starts.

'I know, you don't want to talk about last night,' I lock eyes with Caroline, who gestures with her hands to stick with the script, 'but I need to speak with you, its an emergency of the uhh…vampire kind and It's not something I can talk about over the phone.'

'oh-kay,' he sounds dumbfounded, and even more annoyed if that's possible.

'See you at the boarding house in ten?'

'Twenty,' he quips and the dial tone rings against my eardrum.

"That went better than I expected," my sarcasm filled voice causes Caroline to glare. "What am I suppose to tell him when he gets here? I can't believe I just lied for no reason."

"Suck it up Elena, he will get over it," she stands and places her two hands against the front of my shoulder blades. "When he gets here, you go right in for the kill so he cannot flea before you get your point across. And remember to act like your okay with everything and just want his friendship, it drives men mad," she points out like she's miss relationship guru of the year.

I nod reluctantly…here goes nothing.

Xx x

I sit nervously, staring at my watch. Damon is late, and I'm starting to wonder if he will show up at all. As if on cue he waltz's through the front door, expressionless.

He stands in front of me, and stares into my eyes fearlessly. "What's the big bad emergency we couldn't discuss over the phone?"

His sarcastic tone cuts through me. "There is no emergency Damon."

"What?" his eyes grow wide.

"Please don't be mad I just," I start, but he cuts me off by waving his hand.

"Elena, don't make this harder for you than it already is, we have nothing to talk about…"

Anger bubbles inside of me at his words, and it makes Caroline's advice much easier to follow. "Actually, we do. I wanted to talk to you and tell you that I think you're right. There is no way we could ever work as a couple. I don't want things to be awkward between us, and I really miss your friendship. I was hoping we could put this whole ordeal past us and just pick up where we left off…as friends and nothing more." I fight off the urge to cry as I finish off my speech, "I know I've been holding on to something that just is not there, and I really just want you to be happy. I could see that Gina makes you happy and I think that's great. You deserve it. I really need my friend back."

I want to look into Damon's eyes, search for some emotion that tells me he still loves me, but my weakness prevails over my strength. I lock eyes with something far off to the left. But his silence is deafening, and speaking seems like the best option at this point. "What do you think?"

"Okay," is his only response, but I swear I could hear sadness in his voice.

I finally let my eyes meet his, and we stay like that for a while. Damon shifts as his phone begins to vibrate in his pocket. He pulls it out, glancing at it and rejecting the phone call quickly.

It has to be Gina.

Unexpectedly he reaches over and pulls me to his chest. I gasp in surprise, but gladly accept and return his embrace. My eyes close at their own accord as I breathe in the familiar scent of bourbon and a rich one that is uniquely Damon. His arms circle my waist and hold me close. So close that I could almost feel his heart beat against my own chest. I want to stay in his arms forever, but memories of my plan kill my mood and I pull away. Damon immediately frowns, and I note this reaction almost pleasantly.

"Maybe we could grab a few beers and catch a game of pool later today or tomorrow?" my voice sounds shaky, and I try to hide it with a smile.

"Sure," he nods, returning my smile by only a halve, "tomorrow sounds good."

"The Grill around eight?" I offer.

"I'll be there," his voice is soft and he stares at me as if he's expecting something more.

I only smile.

And with that he's gone …off to return Gina's call, I am sure.

And I'm left with an aching in my chest

Left to doubt that I can follow through with this plan of only friendship…when what I want is so much more, and it's something I may never attain.

Xx

I am so sorry to leave you with a short and rather dull chapter, BUT I promise to release the next one in only a few days and it will be much more interesting! Please let me know what you think of the way I am developing the story line. I really didn't intend to turn this into a sappy, longing love story, but ahhh… the mind does what it does. I hope you all enjoyed this, and I look forward to reading some reviews!

Thanks


End file.
